Here we are, still alive with a couple weeks of college under our belt – we’ve successfully begun a new semester and settled into our new homes.
But to transform a generic white walled dorm room into a place suitable for human inhabitance, we need to outfit our walls with posters of beer, babes, Bob Marley and all the college classics we’ve come to love. We need to bolster our work supplies with staplers and brightly colored paper clips that only make our desks look more functional than they actually are.
We need a supply of Easy Mac and peanut butter, and some speakers to drown out the pop music that the kid next door plays loud enough to let the whole campus know he’s bringing the ‘90s back.
No one could possibly hope to remember each minute detail and pack everything they need for the new school year, and this gives birth to what is quickly becoming a college tradition: The WalMart Run.
Within the first couple days of the new semester, you will inevitably find your way to WalMart, that consumerist mecca that has shelves stocked with everything a cheap college student could possibly dream up.
Need a desk light? No problem, there’s a multitude of them in vibrant colors – putting the “fun” in functional – so you can add a little funk to your work environment. Or how about a tiny vacuum you can fit into your closet? Now you can keep your room spotless and save valuable closet space!
Check out the T-shirt section, and marvel at how a department store was able to purchase the names, licenses and souls of your favorite bands, movies and television shows. I’ll bet no one in the ’60s could fathom Jimi Hendrix becoming a brand of mass-produced clothing, but to be fair I guess they’d have a hard time understanding LOLcats too.
While WalMart has a negative reputation among many, on an undergraduate’s budget there is no other place to snag the unabashed kitsch and off-brand products for half the price of any other store.
Besides, the awkward greetings at the door are a little endearing, and anyone who’s seen Food Inc. can tell you that the chain is becoming more progressive and sustainable. Who knows, maybe I’ll swing by later on today and pick up my copy of Pink Floyd’s The Wall-Mart – I think it’s on rollback.