A panel made up of Geneseo students and faculty shared their experiences as members of the LGBTQ+ community, as well as how their experiences as people of color in the community have affected their lives on Friday Nov. 16.
The event was moderated by president of Pride Alliance Madeline Reichler and freshman representative of Pride Eli Miller who asked questions for the panel to answer in front of an audience of faculty, students and others.
The panel shared their most significant experiences in coming out and facing assumptions from others that it only occurs once. The organizers asked that The Lamron not identify the panelists.
One student panelist found that when he buys flowers in a store, people approach him and ask if the flowers are for his girlfriend, which leaves him to consider if coming out to a stranger and explaining that they are for his male partner is worth it.
“We should rethink coming out as not a one-time act. I continue to come out. It’s a lifelong thing that I have to do,” the student panelist said.
Some panel members spoke of their difficulties in embracing their identities. This included someone whose father’s inability to accept her sexual identity made it difficult for her to come to terms with the fact that she is queer. Others spoke of their comfort with their sexual identities, but also their struggles with people who did not accept their identity so readily.
“I’m okay with who I am and who I have been. The problem has been people telling me that something is wrong with [me],” a panelist said.
Beyond discussing their identities as members of the LGBTQ+ community, the panelists also discussed their experiences as people of color within the community.
One man on the panel spoke about his experiences as an Asian man in queer spaces where he struggles with the stereotype that Asian men are supposed to be quiet, cute and “invisible.” When he calls out a person for being racist, he is suddenly perceived as the “bad guy” because he is stereotyped as silent and unassuming.
Some panel members agreed that they feel welcome in LGBTQ+ spaces when race is not brought up and when they are bonding over shared experiences from being in the community. One student commented that some people in queer spaces may understand privilege and how oppression works but are unable to acknowledge their own white privilege.
“I heard one white kid make a comment that they have this ‘black diva’ inside of them, but when I called him out for it, I became the ‘antagonistic black woman,’” one panelist said. “I thought these people were progressive, but I’ve learned that just because someone is pro LGBTQ+ or a feminist does not mean they are not a racist, and that has been a hard pill to swallow.”
Faculty and students on the panel discovered shared sentiments between themselves through their discussions, as well as important lessons they have learned through experiences.
A faculty member on the panel spoke of how his parents threw him out of his home at the age of 15 and he ended up in foster care after coming out.
“My experience taught me a lot about how to take care of myself, taught me a lot about family. Family isn’t about who you were born to, it is about who accepts you and loves you for who you are.”
“If someone isn’t okay with it, I don’t want them in my life. I’m done trying to compromise for people that can’t accept who I am,” another panelist said.