Caron: Men, women do not experience double standard surrounding sexual behavior

It’s often been said that men and women should be seen equally in society, but they are not when it comes to sex. Evidence, however, seems to offer a reason as to why men and women are judged differently in the field of sex. 

Simplistically, a double standard exists when two similar groups are judged differently. When it comes to sex, however, men and women are different. Generally speaking, men and women do not want the same things. The former, but not the latter, are much more likely to “hook up” with a woman whom they have never met before. 

When a woman asks a random man if they want to have sex, there is a 75 percent chance the man will answer in the affirmative, according to a study titled “Gender Differences in Receptivity to Sexual Offers: A New Research Prototype” from Interpersona, a peer-reviewed online journal. Yet, when the situation is reversed in the study, the number is 0 percent. 

Additionally, when men were asked why they rejected the offer for free sex, the most common answer was that the women did not fit their standard of beauty or they were turned off by their bluntness. By contrast, women were turned off by the fact that a stranger asked for sex or thought they were in danger by such a strange proposition. 

The numbers reflected in this study indicate that men and women are not actively looking for the same things when it comes to sexual intercourse. If they were, the numbers would be equal or nearly the same. What it does show, however, is that women are more selective regarding the men whom they choose to sleep with. This is not difficult to understand why: conventional wisdom demonstrates that, more often, women want an emotional connection when it comes to their relationships with sex partners. 

Laurie J. Watson, a licensed marriage and family counselor, stresses this notion. 

“[A woman’s] need to feel emotionally safe before the sexual moment cannot be overstated,” Watson wrote, according to Psychology Today. Most women, but certainly not all, do not want to fornicate with as many men as they possibly can. Most want to wait until they are emotionally settled with a man until they engage in sexual relations.

The sex drive for men is not the same as it is with women. Watson notes in another article that “it is hard to overestimate the way [a man’s] body chemistry directs his mind’s psychology toward the sexual.” In other words, Watson implies that men are more visual with whom they are sexually attracted to and that because of their attractions, men desire to have sex with as many women as they can. This may explain why, when a man sees a good-looking woman, he might ogle at them, which can, in turn, turn women off or creep them out. 

The results of this study and Watson’s articles suggest that the double standard cannot hold up to scrutiny. If that were the case, men and women would have the same sexual needs. 

In fact, women are more careful with whom they pick for sexual intercourse because they may feel uncomfortable sleeping with a stranger, and they first want to establish an emotional connection. By contrast, men do not care as much since their libido makes them more thrill-seeking when it comes to sex. 

Since each sex has different motives when it comes to sexual relations, the two groups cannot be compared. Therefore, each sex is judged separately and not in conjunction with each other.

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