The winter season is blowing in and bringing all its ill-health effects with it. We're already familiar with the common ailments like colds, the flu, genital icicling and, of course, the yearly mass-migrations of people off tall buildings and bridges like lemmings or Cornell students. But this winter, I will not sit idly by and let what is perhaps the most prevalent and painful of all sub-zero syndromes ravage the perky young flesh of my beloved campus.